KCCK Big Mo News and More

Well, ever since last fall, the Iowa jazz and blues radio station KCCK has been available only on channel 88.3 FM on our radio dial. Channel 106.9 has been out for months. We just found out that 106.9 is now working again and has been for over 3 weeks. It has been a translator channel that broadcasts in addition to 88.3 FM out of Cedar Rapids so that people in Iowa City can have better reception.

The story about why KCCK 106.9 has been out is complicated and traces back to when the Daily Iowan reported in early October of 2023 that because the Iowa City campus of Kirkwood Community College closed, the antenna for KCCK in the area was shut down and other arrangements had to be made for KCCK radio reception in Iowa City.

We never really lost KCCK reception, except on 106.9. It always came through just fine on 88.3. But just a couple nights ago, I heard John Heim aka Big Mo who broadcasts the Big Mo Blues Show on Friday nights starting at 6:00 PM say, as usual, that KCCK is on 88.3 in Cedar Rapids and in Iowa City by translator channel 106.9. He has been saying that for months but nothing came through but static mostly.

And now KCCK 106.9 is back, just like that.

The other news from KCCK is that Big Mo has a Pod cast show now. It just started in recent weeks also. One of them reminds me of what turns out to be a comedy bit he does about May Ree’s hand-battered catfish. He always says she is one of the sponsors for his show. I’ve had my doubts about it but enjoy it anyway. I was evidently one of the many who contacted him asking whether or not the hand-battered catfish story is real. He just advised me to “keep listening.”

It’s not real, but it’s funny. It’s one of a few “Sponsors de faux” comedy bits he has done for a long time. I remember wondering about May Ree and her hand-battered catfish at least a couple of years ago. He has a couple of others which I’ve never heard about: Shorty’s Adult Diapers and Big Furry Shaving Products. I’ve blogged about May Ree a few times. Just search “hand battered catfish.”

Anyway, I thought I’d just pass this along. You can have a lot of fun listening to KCCK radio out of Cedar Rapids and Iowa City, Iowa. I guess now only newcomers will ask whether the May Ree’s Hand-Battered Catfish story is real or not. KCCK of Iowa welcomes new listeners, so…keep listening.

Shoehorn Thoughts

Sena got us three new shoehorns. They’re different sizes: the usual 6-inch, an 11-inch, and a 16-inch.

Of course, you could ask why anyone would need a 16-inch shoehorn. The simple answer is that it’s to help you get your boots on. But would you be able to get it on an airplane in your carry-on bag? Well, one wisecrack answer would be “Yes, if your carry-on is big enough.” I’m not sure what the TSA would say about it.

What if an obstreperous airline passenger was perturbed about not getting his complimentary in-flight Zagnut bar snack, got his carry-on and pulled out that steel 16-inch shoehorn, demanded his complimentary Zagnut and started waving it around like he’s a samurai?

I don’t know the answer, which is yet another reason why I’m reluctant to get on an airplane these days.

Another question I can’t answer is whether those new slip-in Skecher shoes eliminate the need for shoehorns. I couldn’t find a clear answer. On the other hand, I did find out that a few people, including lawyers, think some Skecher shoes can lead to tripping and sustaining injuries that could potentially be worth a small fortune in class-action lawsuits.

I have a pair of Skecher shoes which do seem to make me trip more often than I normally would, even for a geezer. And while I can use a 16-inch shoehorn to get them on, I have to stoop over and straighten out the bunched-up fabric on the top part of the shoe, and just like that I get another back spasm just like the one which drove me to use the shoehorn in the first place.

And where do you store these extra long shoehorns? Sure, they’ve all got a small hole in the handle, which fools you into thinking you could just hang it on one of the coat hanger hooks in your mud room. But the holes are too small. I could tie a shoelace on it and hang it on a coat hanger, but that’s too much work. I guess I could tie a fishing line on it, but I want to store it someplace, not catch a marlin with it.

I found one web site which claimed you can take socks off with a 16-inch shoehorn. Let’s think about that. It’s steel and the edge, while not razor sharp, could tear a hole in your sock. Or it could leave a scratch on your leg or foot. You could do both if you’re handy with a weapon like that.

That sounds like a class-action lawsuit. I should call them and find out what my case could potentially be worth.

The Wendy’s Orange Dreamsicle Frosty Is In Your Dreams

Well, we stopped by the Wendy’s drive up a couple of days ago and tried to order that new Orange Dreamsicle (sometimes called the Creamsicle) Frosty. But they were out of it, mainly because they didn’t order enough of it. I guess it’s a hot-cold item (Har!). They encouraged us to return the next day, which we did.

They had plenty of Orange Frosty. They said it was just like those orange Push-Up Pops you got when you were a kid (what gives? I never got one). Sena said the Push-Ups tasted like orange sherbet, so she was looking forward to it.

OK, if we’d been blindfolded and didn’t know about it in the first place—we wouldn’t have been able to tell there was anything orange about it but the color.

It was a nice enough color, but it tasted so much like vanilla we wondered why they were calling it orange. We thought the same thing about the strawberry and peppermint Frosty’s. The only one that was a hit for us was the Pumpkin Spice flavor—even though some foodies said the main ingredients were milk and soy. Some said it reminded them of eggnog. I got nothing against eggnog.

So, what was in the Orange Push-Ups? I looked this up on line and they were made of cream and orange juice concentrate.

What exactly is in the Orange Dreamsicle Frosty? The dessert is aptly named, because you’re dreaming if you think you’re getting any orange in it.

It’s got milk, sugar, corn syrup, cream, and non-fat milk, plus thickeners and additives for color. There is no orange or even tangerine in it.

What do you want to bet that’s what’s in all the other flavors? When the new flavors come out, Wendy’s says they can’t give you vanilla. Funny, because that’s what most of them taste like. I’m pretty sure it’s because they use the vanilla as a base to make the new flavors.

That’s OK with me because vanilla is my favorite anyway. And chocolate is a close second. Anytime Wendy’s has a new Frosty, we’re up for it!

Solar Eclipse Around the Corner So We May Need to Protect the Cicadas!

The solar eclipse is just around the corner! We’re hoping for decent weather. We’re also hoping that everyone views the event with safety in mind.

University of Iowa Health Care ophthalmologist Dr. Ian Han has great tips on how to observe the solar eclipse on April 8, 2024. He pointed out that eclipse glasses that pass muster for safe viewing of what will be a partial eclipse in Iowa are typically on a list of approved eyewear and often have an ISO (that stands for International Organization for Standardization) number stamped on them. Our glasses have the right stuff!

However, animals sometimes get confused by solar eclipses, including cicadas (see my other post about cicada weirdness posted today). Cicadas might stop singing or maybe their gonads drop off a little sooner than usual, I don’t know exactly. But the zombie cicada gonad apocalypse timing probably makes that a non-issue. I did say “probably.” But how could we protect them if necessary?

There might be a scientific way to custom fit the cicadas with solar eclipse glasses using groundbreaking technology first used in the 1989 documentary film, “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids,” which I have not personally watched but which could be featured on Svengoolie. We’d have to scale up production for possibly trillions of bugs. And I guess we can’t protect their gonads.

But we can all protect our eyes.

Update: I found a very good web site which tells you how to check if your solar eclipse glasses are genuine and protective. In addition to the information above, you can test the eclipse glasses indoors by putting them on. You shouldn’t be able to see anything but the brightest light bulbs and those just barely. You can test them outside as well. On a sunny day, look around at any reflective surface. You shouldn’t be able to see much at all. I tested ours and they passed with flying colors.

Cicada Zombieland

I’m sure you’ve heard the zombie cicada horror movie-like story in the news which sounds like it would make a great episode for the Svengoolie TV show. “Attack of the hallucinating zombie cicadas without gonads” would make a good title. One possible torrid scene suggestion would open in the “living” room (although zombies are not really alive), female (Alice) and male (Fred) cicadas seated on the sofa, lava lamp on the coffee table:

Fred: Alice baby, what’s your sign?

Alice: Your gonads are off, hon.

Fred: Oops. Did I leave them at the racquetball court?

Alice: Hmmm. Have you had your…shots?

Fred: What do you mean?

Alice: You’re not carrying any sexually transmitted diseases, are you?

Fred: I hardly see how that’s possible, since my gonads fell off somewhere. Have another drink of my psychedelic fungus urine, which I am able to shoot out stronger and faster than an elephant!

Alice: Not erotic enough in my book. I’m leaving, Fred.

Fred: Wait a minute, Alice. I’m sure my gonads are around here somewhere; let me check between the sofa cushions!

Cicadas are those bugs which make extremely loud buzzing noises every 13 or every 17 years or whatever, when they dig their way out of the ground to climb trees, molt, and find mates. Sex is the main event for them and possibly trillions of them will be looking to get lucky in the biggest invasion in over 200 years, at least in the southeastern United States.

On the other hand, there is something seriously wrong with some of them. A parasitic fungus with an LSD-like or amphetamine-like substance takes over the males and their sexual equipment just falls right off, replaced by fungus gobs which stick on to other males or females, infecting them and turning them into sex-crazed zombies which kill each other off faster than Woody Harrelson can slaughter the walking dead in Zombieland (a movie I never saw).

This reminds me of a couple of X-Files episodes, as I’m sure it reminds you. One of them is Firewalker in which a silicon-based fungus infects a crew of scientists and kills them off by making them zombie-like spreaders of it, complete with a long, strangely phallic-like sprout which explodes out of their necks, after the victims gradually become psychotic.

The other X-Files episode is Field Trip in which Mulder and Scully get trapped underground covered in a giant gooey fungus which makes them hallucinate their brains out. At the same time, it’s digesting them. Yum.

I don’t think the X-Files producers got the idea for the episodes from the cicada zombies.

The Demonic Shrilling Chicken Rematch

Remember that Shrilling Chicken I tried to juggle a few days ago? Well, I got my revenge for the sore finger it gave me. This is the message to chickens who peck me.

Chicken, meet your juggler!

This time, I put on gloves along with my usual safety goggles to prevent further injuries from the satanic cluck-meister.

I guess I taught that bird a lesson.

Svengoolie Triggers Memory Lane Trip to the Drive Ins

Both Sena and I stayed up to see the cheesy 1972 horror flick The Gargoyles last Saturday night. No kidding, Sena stayed up for the whole thing! The show runs from 7-9:30 PM but the actual movie is only a little over an hour long. It’s about a clan of gargoyles that every 500 years hatch from eggs and wage war on humans to take over the planet. They never get the job done, probably because humans have all the guns and all the gargoyles have are claws and flimsy wings which you don’t see used until the very last scene. Like all of the Svengoolie movies, all of the jokes are so bad they’re good.

You can ask a fair question, which would be what else is on in addition to the movie? There’s a lot of commercials, of course, as well as the corny jokes and skits. But the other features last Saturday were excerpts from the Flashback Weekend Chicago Horror Con, in August 2023. I think it’s an annual historical horror convention that takes place in Rosemont, Illinois.

One of the attractions was a panel presentation about the history of the 90th anniversary of the drive-in theater hosted by Svengoolie and Joe Bob Briggs. It was arguably better than the feature flick. I have heard the history elsewhere about how the drive-in theatre began (I think it was on the travel or history channel).

The most interesting part of the history is how the Covid-19 pandemic influenced the recent history of the drive-in theaters. The point was that, when the pandemic hit the country, all indoor theaters closed, leaving the drive-ins the only place to watch movies for several weeks. They did pretty good business.

Moreover, horror movies and drive-ins go together like cheese and crackers (see what I did there, cheese as in cheesy movies?). OK, fine.

Anyway, horror films were mainly linked to low budget projects that big stars and big directors avoided like the plague. Mainly, those movies were played at the drive-ins—which is how they got a tarnished reputation. That led to cherished stories by older people who used to sneak their friends into the drive-ins by stowing them in the trunks of their cars. That probably did happen, even in the old Mason City Drive-In Theater in Iowa where Sena and I grew up. It was demolished in 1997.

As far as The Gargoyle movie goes, the one thing I couldn’t find out was exactly why Bernie Casey, who played the head gargoyle, didn’t voice his own lines. The web references I found just mentioned briefly that it was because his natural speaking voice didn’t fit the character. They were dubbed in by Vic Perrin who did the voice-over for the introduction to The Outer Limits.

Maybe the funniest scene was when the head gargoyle placated and playfully slapped the fanny of the female head breeder gargoyle after she noticed he was flirting with the human woman he kidnapped. The breeder was obviously really jealous. Maybe this means that the battle between gargoyles and humans will always come to a stalemate because we’re too much alike.

Attack of the Demonic Shrilling Chicken!

Remember that rubber chicken Sena ordered as a joke for what looks like my transformation into a Svengoolie fan? Svengoolie is the longstanding host on the MeTV channel which shows old, cheesy TV horror movies every Saturday.

Svengoolie always gets a lot of rubber chickens tossed at him after he tells a few jokes. Well, the rubber chicken arrived. Actually, I think it’s plastic, about which I’ll have a lot more to say. It’s called Shrilling Chicken. Sena ordered it from Wal-Mart. We’re still waiting for the Svengoolie glow-in-the-dark T-shirt, which she ordered through the Svengoolie web site.

The chicken is about a foot long and squeals when you squeeze it. It’s sold as a dog toy. It’s red and yellow and the first thing I did was to try to juggle with it along with two juggling balls. I thought it would be cool to get a YouTube video of it, especially while wearing the Svengoolie T-shirt.

I was trying to get the hang of juggling a linear chicken with juggling balls and was just getting to where I could do 3 or 4 throws while also squeezing it to make it squeal. And then it happened: the demonic chicken bit me (or is “pecked me” a better way to put it?)! That’s pretty spooky given the connection to Svengoolie, the horror show host.

OK, so it didn’t actually peck me in a satanic manner, but I caught it awkwardly in my right hand. My right index finger swelled up and it got a little sore. It’s healing quickly although it did leave a faint bruise.

Then I looked up Shrilling Chicken on the web. What a rabbit hole! I found warnings seemingly all over the web against getting within 100 yards of the thing because of allegations it contains toxic chemicals. In fact, pretty much all the warnings came from a group called Ecowaste Coalition, with the chief spokesperson being someone named Thony Dizon, Chemical Safety Campaigner.

Thony’s main message is that Shrilling Chicken contains unacceptable levels of “toxic plastic additives.” He cites a long list of European countries that have banned Shrilling Chicken, despite the labels on the package, one of which is “CE” which means that it meets European Union standards.

The warnings go on to say that children should not be allowed to even touch it, although there are dozens of ads on the web showing where you can buy it for kids, with one image of a child hugging a Shrilling Chicken as tall as he is. I didn’t know they made them that big.

Thony also goes on to cite an “FDA Advisory No. 2020-042” which clearly is opposed to Shrilling Chicken being on this planet. I spent quite a while looking for that FDA Advisory in the U.S. FDA website. I couldn’t find it.

If you don’t look closely, you’ll miss the part at the bottom of the page indicating that the “FDA” referred to is the one in the Philippines.

The Shrilling Chicken label also indicates that the toy is approved for kids 6 years and older. It also has the Green Dot symbol on it. Wikipedia says it’s “…to indicate to consumers who see the logo that the manufacturer of the product contributes to the cost of recovery and recycling.” The Shrilling Chicken is made in China.

On the whole, I would say Shrilling Chicken is less than demonic in any sense of the word. However, given what happened to me, I probably would not toss it at Svengoolie.

Also, I would suggest you not try to juggle with it. I had to lay off juggling practice briefly so I can heal up.

The Science on Super Beets?

Sena recently got her bottle of Super Beets with Grape Seed Extract delivered the other day. They are capsules and the label enthusiastically advertises that they are “non-GMO” and will enable the average human to leap tall buildings in a single bound within just minutes of swallowing a total of 9,000 capsules (3 caps per serving and 90 servings per bottle). Just kidding. Sena will take only one capsule a day for now.

They are made and marketed by HumanN and they prominently display important information on the bottle:

“These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.”

Just so you know, the FDA doesn’t approve dietary supplements for safety or effectiveness, although they recently put together a review of scientific data on Cannabis for the HHS which may lead to the DEA changing the schedule of marijuana from Schedule I to Schedule III along with the scientific conclusion that certain formulations of the product may enable the user to leap tall buildings in a single bound—or least feel like he can. Just kidding.

Wait till you see the data on their new product, Chupacabra Chewables. The chews are shaped like little chupacabras and mutilated chickens. Just kidding, they don’t make anything like that, and even if they did, you can be sure it would be non-GMO.

Even though the FDA does not approve dietary supplements (or disapprove of marijuana apparently), that non-GMO detail is something the FDA does have an opinion about. They say on their Agricultural Biotechnology web page that “GMO foods are as healthful and safe to eat as their non-GMO counterparts.”

I searched the internet for studies on super beets and grape seed extract and it turns out there has been some research published about them. There was a meta-analysis in 2017 in which the results that beet juice has blood pressure lowering effects:

Bahadoran Z, Mirmiran P, Kabir A, Azizi F, Ghasemi A. The Nitrate-Independent Blood Pressure-Lowering Effect of Beetroot Juice: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis. Adv Nutr. 2017 Nov 15;8(6):830-838. doi: 10.3945/an.117.016717. Erratum in: Adv Nutr. 2018 May 1;9(3):274. PMID: 29141968; PMCID: PMC5683004.

And there was a randomized, placebo-controlled study also published in 2017 (a good year for supplement studies evidently) showing that grape seed extract modulated blood pressure. It also relieved perceived stress:

Schön C, Allegrini P, Engelhart-Jentzsch K, Riva A, Petrangolini G. Grape Seed Extract Positively Modulates Blood Pressure and Perceived Stress: A Randomized, Double-Blind, Placebo-Controlled Study in Healthy Volunteers. Nutrients. 2021 Feb 17;13(2):654. doi: 10.3390/nu13020654. PMID: 33671310; PMCID: PMC7922661.

I’m going to pass for now on the beet and grape seed extract caps. I can already leap tall buildings in a single bound.

Will Iowans Get the Whole Enchilada with The Upcoming Total Solar Eclipse?

So, are Iowans going to get “the whole enchilada” when it comes to seeing the total solar eclipse on April 8, 2024? No, but we’ll see a partial eclipse. The T-shirt Sena got for me says “Total Eclipse” on it—but it also has extraterrestrials on it, which I really like.

The paths of these total eclipses are narrow. The path of the Total Solar Eclipse on August 21, 2017 would not have been visible in the totality phase for Iowans either. So, no whole enchilada then either.

In fact, I don’t remember the 2017 solar eclipse at all. Sena watched it on TV when CNN televised a special program about it. She noticed that it got dark, probably in the early afternoon. I don’t know what I was doing, but I was no doubt running around the hospital responding to psychiatry consultation requests. I probably wouldn’t have noticed a gigantic enchilada stalking the earth.

In fact, to see a total eclipse back then and next month, we’d have to drive to Carbondale, Illinois. That’s at least a 6-hour drive and probably longer since a lot of people would be on the road with the same goal. There are already warnings from some officials about traffic jams, cell phone problems, and other disasters which can happen during the mad rush to see the whole enchilada.

Which brings me to the question: do you know the origin of the phrase “the whole enchilada”?

I guess the history of the expression is a little dark, in a manner of speaking. Some people don’t define it and bail by comparing it to other similar phrases like “the whole nine yards” or whatever. On the other hand, there are variations on another story of the origin that date back to the Watergate tapes scandal in the era of President Nixon’s administration in the 1970s. Supposedly, John Ehrlichmann called Attorney John N. Mitchell “the big enchilada.”

In general, it means the whole thing, the entirety, everything. So, if we want to see the whole enchilada as far as the total solar eclipse on April 8, 2024, we’d have to drive 6 hours to either Carbondale, Illinois or Poplar Bluff, Missouri. We’ll pass on that.

However, Sena did make the whole enchilada last night for dinner.