I heard the song “Florida Man” by Selwyn Birchwood on the Big Mo Blues Show on KCCK radio tonight. I updated my post “Gators OMG” by adding the YouTube video to it.
Tag: humor
The Gray Catbird Rusty Rump Mystery
I looked into the mystery of the gray catbird’s rusty rump. I mentioned the rusty colored feathers under its tail feathers in yesterday’s post. For some reason the underside of its tail feathers looks a little messy. I was able to get more video evidence about what might be the cause.
The catbird looks fastidious. That may be misleading. Scientific observation reveals what is really going on.
This is probably also the origin of an old saying. I think it was Plato who said, “Never stand under a bird.”
Acting Up on Scott Boulevard
We took a walk on Scott Boulevard used my smartphone for the first time to take selfies with the Sitting Man. Can you believe it? I’ve had that phone for over 7 years and never took a selfie with Sena until then.
It was a sunny day and we walked clear out to the intersection of Scott Boulevard and Rochester Avenue. When we did this last February, we saw a sculpture by Iowa City artist, Eugene Anderson. It’s a striking white abstract called “Family.”
Except it wasn’t there anymore. There was a lot of heavy construction equipment and large excavation holes with construction stakes all pretty close to the concrete pedestal where the sculpture had been mounted.
But it was gone. We remembered talking with the developer not so long ago about the new development planned for the area. He mentioned something about a plan for moving the piece somewhere. I sent him a message asking about it.
The President of the Harvest Preserve Board, Douglas Paul himself, got back to me about the sculpture. This is the same Douglas Paul who created the Sitting Man sculpture. Eugene Anderson’s sculpture is in the shop getting needed repairs. Doug Paul is doing the work on it. The plan for now is to move it to the western entrance of Harvest Preserve. It’ll be near the gate, visible from Scott Boulevard.
Doug Paul told me about his book, Go Figure. You might be interested; I know I am.
Juggling and The Wings of Change!
The other day we were at Terry Trueblood Recreation Area mainly to see how juggling goes outdoors for me. We filmed the event for posterity.
It turns out that “wings” had a lot to do with it. I juggled next to Hilde DeBruyn’s sculpture “Winds of Change.” It’s my favorite sculpture, although the winds of change are dictating that the Iowa City Parks Dept. is again going to accept new sculptures for this year which will replace all of those currently on display.
Wings figured in a different way and you can tell by how I react to the bugs flying around. We picked a nice spring day when all the winged insects were buzzing around in my face.
The level of juggling difficulty goes way up when gnats are zipping up my nose, my ears, my mouth, etc.
Always Wear Safety Glasses When Claw Juggling!
I just got a new eyeglass prescription a few days ago. I figured a year was long enough to wait after my surgery for an acute on chronic retinal detachment of my right eye. My vision in that eye has changed quite a bit, but I think new glasses will help a lot.
My old pair of eyeglasses is pretty beat up. Juggling has not helped. I’ve knocked them off my head a couple of times lately. That has not helped the poor fit.
I’m also practicing a new juggling trick called the claw. The throw and catch techniques are very different. You have to claw catch the balls from the top. I end up slamming them on the floor or off my groin. Juggling takes dedication and sacrifice—but there’s a limit.
I think I need safety equipment. I’ll be getting new eyeglasses, but it might be a good idea to get a pair of safety glasses. I just happen to have an old pair of plastic safety glasses from the time Sena bought me a battery-powered pole saw for tree trimming in the back yard a few years ago. Talk about safety. It takes at least as much agility and coordination to dodge a heavy falling tree limb as it does to dodge a juggling ball.
The claw trick puts a vicious spin on the ball and it can fly anywhere at meteoric speed. Controlling the arc and direction to fit the cascade pattern is quite a challenge. Balls frequently ricochet off each other, which is why I don’t drink my coffee during juggling practice. Practicing the claw reminds me that juggling is great exercise. I’m flying all over the place, lunging, leaning, and ducking.
But I might need a helmet.
How Can You Wash Your Face Without Washing Your Beard?
OK, Sena washed my beard with beard wash the other day and then I hopped in the shower, rinsed off the suds and applied the beard conditioner.
Then I got to thinking about what I’d been doing about washing my face (and necessarily my beard) with a moisturizing soap every day. This was before Sena got a beard care kit for me, and I did the same thing for months prior to that. I used a body and face soap on my face, and my face was covered with hair from my beard.
You can make the argument that you shouldn’t use regular hair shampoos on your beard because it’ll strip away all the oils you need. And you can say that you shouldn’t use beard wash to wash your face. But on the “face” of it, doesn’t that sound silly?
I got on the web and tried to ask it as a question. How can you wash your face without washing your beard? The search yields the message “This site cannot be reached.” I didn’t bother to ask an Artificial Intelligence (AI) nerd about it. I’m sure AI would either give a nonsense answer or blow a fuse.
I was not surprised. There are dozens of face wash products out there for men who have beards. Then the advice is to not use face soap on your beard. And you’re not supposed to use beard wash on your face.
Am I missing something here? I suspect I’m just encountering the usual marketing strategies for selling me something I probably don’t really need.
I found one video with a guy who has a magnificent mustache and beard in which he’s supposed to tell you what he does about cleaning his face. It’s not a YouTube video. I couldn’t get past his simple comment in the first segment of the video in which he says he washes his face once a day. That took a few seconds. Then the video just quit working.
Apparently, what I have to do is simple. I just remove my beard every day before washing my face with a facial soap. Then I put my beard in the bathroom sink and scrub it with beard wash. But I shouldn’t do that more than 2-3 times a week. Next, I reattach my freshly washed beard to my clean face.
So, when do apply my beard oil? I read that it should be applied once, and preferably, twice a day. Sorry, I don’t want beard oil or beard balm on my pillow case, thank you. On the other hand, I noticed that you can buy beard masks. One web site advertises that it’s for protecting your well-groomed beard. The price is $20.
Getting back to the question of how to wash your face without washing your beard and vice versa, I’m pretty sure this is an experiment by extraterrestrials to see if humans are smart enough yet to meet with them so we can teach them how to drive their flying saucers without forever crashing them all over our planet.
When I figure out how to wash my face without washing my beard, I’ll let you know—after I’ve patented the method and I’m ready to market a product I’d be happy to sell you for the low, low price of just $20, on a monthly subscription plan.
Beard Kit Passes Muster and Makes Me Glow!
I tried the new beard kit stuff yesterday. I washed my beard with the beard wash and conditioner. Then I applied a little beard oil and beard balm. I combed it and brushed up with the boar bristle brush. Try saying “boar bristle brush” three times really fast right now!
I trimmed the flyaways with the very sharp scissors and—oops. I accidentally nipped my left earlobe off. It ricocheted off the mirror and splashed into the toilet. This was not a problem and from my internet research, I knew exactly what to do.
I quickly got a soup ladle and fished my earlobe out of the toilet bowl. Wrapping it in a wet washcloth, I then tossed it into a little watertight bag. Immediately, I put that into a sandwich bag with ice to preserve my earlobe. It would not have been a good idea to put it directly on ice. That would have worsened the damage. I knew better than to put it in milk, especially skim milk! That stuff doesn’t even taste like milk.
The emergency room doctor at first didn’t believe I accidentally snipped off my earlobe. He wanted to get a psychiatric consultation, but I assured him that I’m a retired consultation-liaison psychiatrist and I’m OK. I may have a screw loose but I would never cut off any of my own body parts. He reattached my earlobe and I’m as good as new.
I guess that means I’m officially anointed from a beard kit standpoint.
Sena says I glow now. Judge for yourself from the unretouched before and after photos.
The Beard Kit and the Promise of Beignets Arrive
Yesterday, the beard kit and other items were delivered. The other items were a barber cape and Café Du Monde Beignet Mix. I took a picture of all of them and can’t readily explain why the odd item out seems to be the Beignet Mix. Sena cuts my hair and the old cape just needs to be replaced.
We got the Café Du Monde mix and the rolling pin because Sena plans to make Beignets in the near future. We were in New Orleans while I was attending an Academy of Consultation-Liaison annual meeting in November 2015. We actually got Beignets while we there and we’re pretty sure it was at the Café Du Monde. It was sprinkling rain and a bit chilly that day, but the Beignets were delicious.
Maybe Sena plans to sprinkle powdered sugar in my beard after I get it rehabbed with the beard kit.
Anyway, the unboxed beard kit, which is made by a company called Viking, was very well packed and contained many tools and products. A couple of them are worth commenting about because they raised puzzling questions, at least for me. The beard wash and beard conditioner both contain cautions about using them if you’re pregnant, advising consultation with your physician. I’m sure about the wording because I had to use a magnifying glass to read the labels.
Initially I was not sure why women would use them at all. I searched the internet and it turns out that a woman can use beard oil (which also comes with my new kit) for the hair on her head, face, cuticles, and more. I guess when you think about it, beard wash and conditioner are not that different from products women use for their own hair. I’m still not sure why they should consult a physician before using them.
The kit came with beard balm. I gather from reading on the internet that it conditions and softens the beard. The beard brush is used after applying beard balm, to spread it out. It looks kind of like softened butter. Wild boar bristle brushes are frequently recommended for exfoliating skin and distributing the oils on skin. Brushing with it actually feels good. I’m not so sure about claims that it can promote more beard growth, but the bristles are stiff enough that I can spread the hair I do have over the potholes!
Sometimes badger bristles are used in brushes instead of wild boar hair but it’s far less common. I suggest avoiding this topic with anyone from Wisconsin, especially if he played football in college.
The kit also came with both a beard comb and a smaller mustache comb. Many advise using both but caution against using a brush on wet hair. The small pair of scissors is very sharp. My first use of it was to cut the foil seals glued very tightly to the bottles of beard wash and beard conditioner. They’re very good for snipping off the flyaways.
There’s a lot more to know about getting this beard thing right than I ever imagined. And Sena has a rolling pin and will make Beignets. We’ll pretend we’re in New Orleans. I’ll get powdered sugar in my beard and I won’t have to brush it out with a wild boar bristle brush because my beard is already white.
Thoughts on Gaming Disorder
I just read an interesting article in the latest print issue of Clinical Psychiatry News, Vol. 51, No. 5, May 2023: “Gaming Disorder: New insights into a growing problem.”
This is news to me. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual lists it as an addiction associated with the internet primarily. It can cause social and occupational dysfunction, and was added to the DSM-5-TR in 2013 according to my search of the web. I’m not sure why I never heard of it. Or maybe I did and just failed to pay much attention to it.
There are studies about treatment of the disorder, although most of them are not founded in the concept of recovery. The research focus seems be on deficits. One commenter, David Greenfield, MD, founder and medical director of the Connecticut-based Center for Internet and Technology Addiction, said that thirty years ago, there was almost no research on the disorder. His remark about the lack of focus on recovery was simple but enlightening, “Recovery means meaningful life away from the screen.”
Amen to that.
That reminded me about the digital entertainment available thirty years ago. In 1993, the PC game Myst was released. Sena and I played it and were mesmerized by this simple, point and click adventure game with intricate puzzles.
Of course, that was prior to the gradual evolution of computer gaming into massive multiplayer online role-playing and first-person shooters and the like. It sounds like betting is a feature of some of these games, which tends to increase the addictive potential.
Sena plays an old time Scrabble game on her PC and other almost vintage age games. I have a cribbage game I could play on my PC, but I never do. I much prefer playing real cribbage with Sena on a board with pegs and a deck of cards. We also have a real Scrabble game and we enjoy it a lot. She wins most of the time.
This is in contrast to what I did many years ago. I had a PlayStation and spent a lot of time on it. But I lost interest in it after a while. I don’t play online games of any kind. I’m a little like Agent K on Men in Black II when Agent J was unsuccessfully trying to teach him how to navigate a space ship by using a thing which resembled a PlayStation controller:
Agent J: Didn’t your mother ever give you a Game Boy?
Agent K: WHAT is a Game Boy?
Nowadays, I get a big kick out of learning to juggle. You can’t do that on the web. I like to pick up the balls, clown around, and toss them high, which occasionally leads to knocking my eyeglasses off my head. I usually catch them.
Juggling is a lot more fun than playing Myst. I would prefer it to any massive multiplayer online game. I never had a Game Boy.
Off The Head Juggle Trick So Wrong but My Way
My take on the off the head juggle trick is that I have to do it wrong, otherwise I just drop all the balls. It was Juggle Man who said “Doing it wrong makes you an artist.”
I have to take my eyeglasses off for this trick. I knocked them off my head the other day and they don’t fit well enough to even stay on my head too well.
I think, with more practice, I can mix up the off the head variations to make it interesting, as long as you don’t look too closely.
I can always say I did it my way.
Addendum May 17, 2025: I just noticed that my video is third from the top on a google search of “off the head juggle”. Please ignore my “version” of the head stall juggle (off the head). It’s just wrong!
Go Retire Psychiatrist 