Sena has again been winning virtually every cribbage game. We always play 3 games, best of two wins and skunk wins don’t count. I think I play pretty well. She just plays better.
It reminds me of the song “Anything You Can Do (I Can Do Better).” It’s a song from the musical “Annie Get Your Gun.”
Her motto is “I will not be defeated!” I’m beginning to suspect there is extraterrestrial assistance at her elbow. If that’s the case, can a 29 hand for her be far behind?
“Calling all stations, clear the air lanes, clear all air lanes for the big broadcast!” (Svengoolie show intro).
Fee Fi Fo Fum, something shlocky this way comes! Next Saturday the Svengoolie show will present the movie “Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster.” It’s not the Frankenstein’s monster you know and love necessarily, and it involves Martians looking to repopulate their planet’s female population. Can I even stand it?
OK, so the name of the film is actually Village of the Damned, released in 1960 and directed by Wolf Rilla. It stars George Sanders as Professor Gordon Zellaby and Barbara Shelley as his wife, Anthea Zellaby. It’s based on a British Novel, The Midwich Cuckoos by John Wyndham. The gist of the story is that the whole village of Midwich falls asleep, wakes up a few hours later and things are fine until two months pass. That’s when all the trouble starts. You can see the movie on the Internet Archive.
It just so happens that the Great Mutato (Izzy) from the X-Files episode, “The Post-Modern Prometheus” is running around the village impregnating all the women. OK, so Izzy’s not part of the plot at all but it sounds cool.
One morning, all the people of Midwich fall unconscious in the middle of whatever they’re doing, which might have been a community wide orgy (usually prohibited by Homeowner Association rules) based on what happens next. The Midwich women do all get pregnant at the same time which raises eyebrows, and leads to the men raising many glasses of beer because they’re not thrilled about it.
According to an x-ray, which happens to be that of a man, the pregnancy outbreak is indiscriminate. Actually, Svengoolie let the cat out of the bag on that, revealing the goof of using an x-ray of a man by mistake. Of course, the doctors point at the film and sagely remark that the fetus is developing normally. One of the doctors is a smoker. Maybe the x-ray of a man was used to avoid using an x-ray of a pregnant woman, which is not the greatest idea in the world.
This reminds me of our freshman medical school radiology teacher. Dr. Bill Erkonen was the nicest guy in the world and he always reassured us that we shouldn’t try to memorize anything for the radiology exams. He would advise, “Just learn it.” Of course, we were medical students and we knew there was no way to learn anything in medical school; memorization was the only path. We loved him.
Anyway, they (meaning the women) all deliver at the same time and the whippersnappers mature at a highly accelerated rate (males learn quickly to stay away from dangerous things like vacuum cleaners). And their eyes glow. All they have to do is stare at the adults who immediately buy them expensive cars, jewelry, and designer sunglasses. They also teach adults to avoid the self-checkout aisles at grocery stores.
But they can also force adults to do scary things. This becomes a world-wide phenomenon leading to drastic actions by governments to do something about the kids with the danged eyeballs. The solutions don’t include hiring them to work for the post office.
I thought this was actually a pretty good movie. It’s probably a film inspired in part by the post-WWII, Cold War era and the threat of attack from some outside unknown, malignant force. The title of John Wyndam’s book “The Midwest Cuckoos” is based on bird behavior, specifically that of cuckoos laying their eggs in another bird’s nest leaving it to be raised by another bird at the expense of its own. Brown-headed cowbirds do the same thing. The X-Files extraterrestrial-human hybrid mythology is another way to express the idea. The violence in the film makes it unsuitable for younger or sensitive viewers.
I caught the Big Mo Blues Show last night and the podcast this morning, titled “Grab a Twelve Pack and be Somebody.” I had a hard time picking out any of the five songs having anything close to a lyric that would be close to “Grab a Twelve Pack and be Somebody” but it’s easy to get the idea that many blues and rock songs seem to involve references to alcohol.
I think even Big Mo thought one of the selected songs had something to do with either a 6 or 12 pack of beer. But he did talk about the song “Brown Liquor” by Ally Venable & Christone Kingfish Ingram reminding him (and it reminded me also) of Bob Margolin’s song “Brown Liquor in a Dirty Glass.”
In line with the theme of the podcast today, you could endorse the saying “The Blues had a baby and they named it rock and roll.” I had to look up that line and it’s from Muddy Waters” album, Hard Again (which I still have, by the way) and there’s a song on it with that title. Bob Margolin was in the band at that time. I still don’t understand the lyrics of another song on the album with the title “Crosseyed Cat.” But it’s still one of my favorites.
Just a remark on the Margolin’s song “Brown Liquor in a Dirty Glass” I found out something I didn’t know about ordering a drink “in a dirty glass.” It might mean adding an olive or olive juice. I don’t know if that’s true or not.
I was surprised to learn that one of last night’s song, “Sinner,” was by Robert Randolph, head of a gospel group. Judging from the lyrics, it sounds like the song is against religion.
But the first song of the night was “Summertime Blues”. It sort of fits the heat wave this weekend.
I don’t get out often to the mall to do mall walking, but I did today. I put on a little over 2.5 miles on my step counter. Mall walking is OK for exercise although I have to drive over there. Right next door to the entrance to the mall is the outdoor entrance to Planet Fitness, which is kind of ironic. But you have to pay a membership fee to use the facilities there. You can just walk through the mall for free and it opens an hour before the other shops just to accommodate mall walkers.
I think mall walking does wonders for my lower back. I see a lot of older people who look like they make mall walking regular exercise. They’re my age or older. Some of them have physical challenges that may be the reasons why they mall walk, that is, for conditioning. Their physicians might have even recommended it.
A minority of mall walkers I see are young, so this isn’t just for the elderly. Occasionally I’ll see a group who are challenged in various ways. Today it looked like the guy who was blind and using a cane was right out in front, actually leading the group.
Mall walking has advantages over, say, walking downtown. It beats getting clobbered by an exploding manhole lid, bit by a dog, or mugged.
There are some studies about mall walking, but the authors of a 2015 review mainly noted that there’s a need for more rigorous studies. Their conclusion sounds a little grumpy:
“We found the potential for mall walking programs to be implemented in various communities as a health promotion measure. However, the research on mall walking programs is limited and has weak study designs. More rigorous research is needed to define best practices for mall walking programs’ reach, effectiveness, adoption, implementation, and maintenance.”
Farren L, Belza B, Allen P, Brolliar S, Brown DR, Cormier ML, Janicek S, Jones DL, King DK, Marquez DX, Rosenberg DE. Mall Walking Program Environments, Features, and Participants: A Scoping Review. Prev Chronic Dis. 2015 Aug 13;12:E129. doi: 10.5888/pcd12.150027. PMID: 26270743; PMCID: PMC4552141.
Maybe the authors need to go for a walk.
It’s inspiring to see some of the mall walkers out there despite having major disability of one kind or another. I often see a lady who uses a wheeled walker and cannot hold her head up straight. When she sits down for a break, it looks like she’s collapsed. But she just gets up and at it again a few minutes later.
Mall walking may be understudied—but it’s also underestimated as a sign of resilience in anyone young or old.
The University of Minnesota Center for Infectious Disease Research and Policy (CIDRAP) posted a news report about the upcoming CDC ACIP meeting next Wednesday. Apparently, so far the new advisory committee draft agenda does not include a vote on the Covid-19 vaccine.
There is a Heat Advisory forecast for much of Eastern Iowa this weekend. Temperatures could be above 100 degrees with the heat index. Plan accordingly and be aware of National Weather Service alerts.
We have this lone wild turkey who hangs out in Sena’s backyard garden. I’m going to refer to it using male pronouns because I think it’s a jake, which I think is proper lingo for young male turkeys.
We saw 4 or 5 turkeys last year traipsing through the yard. I think the winter was hard on the small flock and this guy is the only one who survived.
I’m going to call him Jake for now until somebody corrects me about the gender and thinks of a cooler name. The hens usually have bluish-gray heads and are smaller. Jake’s head has a lot of red in it. He also has a couple of spurs on his legs and I think hens usually don’t. I used this website for general guidance.
You can’t say “never” or always” about the characteristics of male and female turkeys. I see web references that say hens can have beards, which are those hairy things stuck to their chests.
One thing that confuses me is the guidance about the tips of the breast feathers, which says they’re always black on males and brown on females. Almost everything about Jake says he’s male except for the feather tips you see in the video while he’s preening. They look brown.
Jake has a horn on the front of his head, which will eventually become the snood, which is a wormy-looking kind of appendage that dangles off the front of the heads of male turkeys.
Males usually strut, but I think Jake doesn’t because he’s alone and doesn’t have a reason to strut, which is to compete for dominance with other males. There are no other males.
It’s a little unusual for turkeys to be loners. I don’t know if there’s a clear explanation for why some turkeys are loners. I think it’s fairly common for hens in the breeding and nesting season to be solitary.
We saw a big flock of turkeys last year in the back yard of a previous neighbor. They evidently all hopped over their fence and then acted like they couldn’t figure out how to jump back out. I made a YouTube video of it because it was comical.
I don’t know how Jake will find another flock to join.
I just read a few news articles and saw a couple of videos on something called the sit and rise or sitting rising exercise. It’s not the same as the sit to stand exercise, which is how many times you stand up from a chair without falling down after drinking several beers. The sit and rise exercise is sitting down and then standing back up in a cross-legged position.
Just to let you know, there are dozens of news stories that claim if you can’t do the sit and rise exercise without using one or both hands or a crane to get back up, you’re marked for death within hours. Make sure your last will and testament is notarized.
OK, I also saw a Snopes fact-check story about the sit and rise thing and it’s a myth that the inability to do it predicts mortality within a few years. It does indicate you have problems with mobility and that could be from a number of factors, including previous joint injuries and not having legs. Check a full-length mirror.
Apparently, there was a study done in Brazil in 2012 that got this story going about imminent mortality if you can’t do the sit and rise cross-legged routine. It looks like there have been news stories about it every year or so since then just to scare old people.
I can’t do the sit and rise cross-legged and wondered if there’s some kind of trick to it. There isn’t and the main problem according to experts are weak glutes. And I’m able to stand on one leg for 30 seconds and I can do 3-4 reps of the single sit to stand exercise on both legs. I also have no problem getting up from a chair from a sitting position without pulling myself up using grab bars or having somebody haul me up with a tow chain.
I can’t remember a time when I could even sit cross-legged, although I guess I did when I was in kindergarten. When I took a Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) course, I had to try to sit cross legged to meditate and I was numb in my hips and knees within a couple of minutes. When I got up, I usually fell over, sustained a minor head injury and was rushed to the ER about 1,200 times (“It’s Dr. Amos again; he’s been trying to sit in that lotus position” “OK, put him in the rack.”).
There’s a web page that gives advice on how to fix a problem with not being able to sit in a crossed leg position for longer than a minute. The author provides a short list of exercises without instructions for how to do them:
Child Pose: I imagine this resembles standing pigeon-toed, holding your crotch and dancing around a little about an hour after drinking a half-gallon of Kool-Aid.
Pigeon Pose: This is kind of like the Child Pose only it’s done while pooping on the head of a statue.
Toe Touch: Self-explanatory but apparently you can touch anything with your toe as long as it’s not something recently expelled from a pigeon.
Vajrasana: It involves contacting extraterrestrials who will assist you by inserting various probes in several orifices while you remain very still to allow the tracking device to be correctly installed.
Lung Pose: I’m not sure how this strengthens your glutes but obviously it involves surgery. Check your insurance.
Bridge Pose: This might tone your glutes if you dive off a bridge without a parachute. Make sure your life insurance policy is up-to-date.
That about does it for the sit and rise cross-legged issue. Remember, it’s only when you do it while cross-eyed that all the trouble starts. Glad I could clear that up.
This essay is satirical.
Sena was at the store yesterday and some guy (a total stranger) in a motorized scooter rode up to her and said, “I have trouble sleeping” and asked her where to find the kiwi fruit in the produce section. It didn’t faze her because this didn’t sound like a pickup line, you know like that joke on the TV commercial: “Why do iguanas reproduce only once a year? That’s because they have e-reptile dysfunction.”
Actually, the guy was looking for kiwi fruit because he had heard that it can help you sleep. So, she told him where it was. A little later, she saw him wandering around and asked him if he’d found the kiwi fruit. He hadn’t so she got a package for him.
It turns out there is a news article saying there are a few small studies indicating that eating a couple of kiwis (remember, this is about the fruit, not the birds) about an hour before you hit the sack can help you sleep. They have a lot of serotonin which your body turns into melatonin which can promote sleep.
You have to be careful about eating kiwis if you have a latex or fruit allergy because you could have a reaction. And if you have diabetes you need to be aware kiwis are high in sugar.
The thing is, you have to eat a couple of them about an hour before bedtime. Often enough I find that I’m napping in the evening in front of the TV long before then—but that’s probably because there’s usually nothing on but reruns and the usual commercials about cannabidiol (CBD) products, total body deodorants, and snake oil for e-reptile dysfunction.
In fact, there’s also some limited evidence that kiwi fruit can just help you feel better in general. It’s mainly about yellow kiwi fruit rather than the green ones. The yellow ones are called SunGold, and they have a lot of vitamin C. Actually, if you don’t like kiwi fruit, you can find other fruits and vegetables containing a lot of vitamin C, including strawberries and oranges—and broccoli. Go with kiwi fruit.
On the other hand, it looks like you might pay about 3x more for the yellow kiwi than the green.
Kiwi fruits are packed with vitamins. You can get 100% of vitamin C from SunGold and they have more than 20 vitamins and minerals. More than a million tons of kiwi fruit are produced every year. You can make kiwi pizza-if you’re on drugs!
And if you eat a couple of SunGold kiwis a day you could feel so good you might be more willing to contribute to the foundation for assisting iguanas with e-reptile dysfunction.
Go Retire Psychiatrist 