Category: Iowa

Thoughts on the GuideLink Center Incident

The attack a few days ago by what was most likely a mentally ill person on staff at the recently opened GuideLink Center in Iowa City reminded me of what may appear to be disparate views by mental health professionals on the link between mental illness and mass violence perpetrators.

The GuideLink incident involved a person who assaulted GuideLink staff and who also left bags containing incendiary devices at the center and another building in Iowa City. The person is being charged with terrorism and is currently in custody in the Johnson County Jail.

I have not seen information about any injuries sustained by the mental health center staff. There were no explosions or fires at either location where incendiary devices were left. Bomb squad experts removed the devices. It’s not clear whether the perpetrator had been a GuideLink Center client.

The GuideLink Center opened in February 2021 and by all reports is a welcome and very much needed crisis stabilization mental health resource in the community. The staff members are dedicated to their calling.

Dr. H. Steven Moffic, MD, a retired psychiatrist who writes for Psychiatric Times, readily says that the perpetrators sometimes do have mental illness that at least contributes to committing acts of mass violence. Dr. George Dawson, MD, another retired psychiatrist, seems to say that the major reason for mass shootings is the ready availability of guns, a culture of gun extremism, and mental illness accounts for a small proportion of acts of mass violence.

But neither Dr. Moffic nor Dr. Dawson say that it’s only either mental illness or guns (or other instrument of mass violence) that lead to acts of mass violence. Both are important.

I’m a third retired psychiatrist and by now some readers might be asking themselves whether they should listen to any retired psychiatrist. Experience counts.

Speaking for myself, as a general hospital psychiatric consultant I was frequently faced with violent patients in the general hospital. Often, I found it necessary to ask a judge for a court order to involuntarily hospitalize a violent and/or suicidal patient on a locked psychiatric unit by transfer from an open medical or postsurgical unit.

In order to obtain an order in the state of Iowa, I had to be able to state to the judge that the patient in question had a treatable mental disorder and was an acute threat to himself and/others. In most situations, I had an open bed on a locked psychiatric unit available ahead of time.

Even if a Code Green was necessary, I usually had an inpatient resource to which I could move the patient. A Code Green is a show of force or takedown maneuver by a specially trained team to control a violent patient while minimizing injury to everyone involved.

I don’t know if that kind of approach is even possible in a community crisis stabilization setting like the GuideLink Center. I think it’s fortunate that it partners with many other community resources including the Johnson County Sheriff’s Office.

The outcome of the incident at the GuideLink Center was that the overall safety of the staff, the patient, and the community was preserved. More resources like this are needed everywhere. They deserve all the support we can give them.

Planet Pella

I thought I would bring readers up to date on what’s happening with our panel bottom of the door weatherstrip seal replacement. Notice how I’m picking up the vocabulary of Pella door and window replacement parts?

I’ve concluded that the Pella corporation I’ve been dealing with over the telephone must be another planet. It’s probably the planet Pella, in the Pella star system in the Mecetti Province of the Tapani Sector. It produced and may still be producing huge harvests of grains and vegetables annually, which makes it an important agricultural producer of the sector.

It can’t be the Pella corporation that is located in Pella, Iowa—you know, where the Pella Tulip Festival is held every year and supposedly the headquarters of the large producer and sales center for doors and windows.

I’ll tell you why I think Pella (or at least the Pella I’ve been in touch with, sort of) is another planet in a galaxy far, far away. Hang on to your tin foil hat. For about the last month, I’ve been trying to get a replacement bottom of the door weather seal for our Pella door. I’ve talked to several customer service representatives who are friendly, polite, and who have been honestly trying to be helpful.

However, something is getting lost in the communication. I suspect it’s because somehow, the telephone connection has been hijacked by a wormhole between Earth and the planet Pella in the Tapani Sector. I thought things like this happened only in novels by Douglas Adams, as in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

I think I’m being connected with the Ministry of Agriculture on the planet Pella. Agents there are getting my calls by mistake because of the wormhole vortex detour.

It started with the requirement for a serial number—any serial number. I sent pictures of the door. One of them was of a label stuck to the door indicating that it is a fire door. There is a number stamped on the top of the door which is a date: March 11, 2011. There is no serial number stamped on the top hinge—which does bear the Pella label, as do the other two hinges.

I gave them pictures of the door which has the kerfs (slots) on the door bottom where the barbs of the door seal should be driven. We took the door off the hinges and removed the old seal so that I could send pictures of the shredded seal as well as pertinent shots of the door itself.

Planet Pella gave up on the serial number requirement and sent us two small weatherstrips which were obviously not meant for our door. They sent it free of charge at least. It also took a rather long time to get to us, given that we’re only about an hour and a half away—that is, if you believe the delivery was from Pella, Iowa. Despite the lengthy time to delivery, the package bore a label marked “Rapid Response” in large red letters. Sure, if it’s from the Tapani Sector.

I spent a long time on the phone with the Minister of Agriculture. It’s possible that the agent on the planet Pella who was in charge of mailing the package got hungry on the way to the post office and stopped off at the break room for microwave popcorn and a soda. The package got left in the break room, where it was found by the custodian days later. It was somehow saved from the trash compactor, stamped with “Rapid Response” and beamed down to us.

I thought we got things cleared up and Pella gave it a second try. We just got another package marked “Rapid Response” and guess what? It’s the right seal but it’s the wrong size!

Well, back to the phone and several times on hold while the Minister of Agriculture checked several times with the supervisor who had to be convinced that I didn’t want a shipment of soybeans (we’ve got plenty of that in Iowa) but the right size door seal. I sent another picture, this time of the old shredded seal next to the one they sent for comparison, which was obviously the wrong size. Come to find out they sent the seal for a patio door, not a fire door.

We’re on the third attempt for planet Pella to get it right. They assure me that they’ll get it right this time. I imagine they’ll ship it again by Rapid Response—along with a bushel of soybeans, compliments of the Prime Minister of the Tapani Sector.

UFO Sighted in Iowa So Break Out Your Tin Foil Hats!

Did you see the breaking news about a UFO sighting in Iowa in the last couple of days? You better get up to date because you don’t want to get caught in the tractor beam along with the cows. Get your tin foil hats.

Sena and I are not sure what to make of the UFO report in the Polk County area. The windshield the guy shot the video through is pretty dirty. The object in the sky spins pretty quickly. We figure the aliens have to be gorging on Dramamine.

The UFOs have plenty of opportunities to beam up the cows and anybody else who gets caught out in the open. Sena and I got abducted and had to think fast to get out of a fix.

The aliens accidentally beamed up a cow, which is no surprise—it’s Iowa, after all. They cooked the cow. Heinous! Horrific! Tasty with baked beans. The aliens were going to barbecue us until Sena showed them her recipe for cherry cobbler.

We ran into Fox Mulder up there. He was trying to talk his way out of a special dental implant.

It’s not like Iowa never gets visitors from outer space. There have been reports in the past, at least one from Council Bluffs.

Instructions for making tin foil hats are all over the web. Better get busy.

Update on James Alan McPherson Park Memorial Plaque

Sena suggested we send a message to Iowa City Mayor Bruce Teague inquiring about the proposed memorial plaque to James Alan McPherson, Pulitzer Prize winning author and longtime Iowa Writers’ Workshop faculty member.

I can remember only one other time in my life that I wrote a letter to an elected official. I wrote President Barack Obama in 2013, basically complaining about the Maintenance of Certification (MOC) program for physicians. I’m not sure what I expected him to do about it. Like many doctors, I was frustrated about the regulatory requirements from certification boards. I thought they were unnecessary and burdensome.

I received a reply which was completely off topic and probably not written by the President. The letter from “President Obama” didn’t answer or even come close to addressing the concerns about what I thought was regulatory harassment. In fact, I never kept the reply and forgot about it.

But the email to Mayor Bruce Teague was different. We just asked about the timeline on the memorial plaque for the James Alan McPherson Park, which was renamed last year. The celebration and ribbon cutting reveal of the new sign was in early August 2021. The memorial plaque was still in the planning stage. We’ve driven by the park several times in the last year looking for it.

Mayor Teague’s reply came the day after we sent our message. It was definitely pertinent and to the point. McPherson’s daughter Rachel is still looking over the wording on the mock-up of the plaque, considering what to include. After her approval, it would take about 10-12 weeks to complete.

Now that’s a quick and specific answer from a political leader. Mayor Teague also sings.

Hickory Hill Park with Sena the Bigfoot Hunter

Because we found that tree structure in Hickory Hill Park recently, Sena led us on a Bigfoot hunt yesterday.

At first all we saw were more dragonflies. One was a male Widow Skimmer. We knew it was a male because it had white patches on its wings. So the first one we saw the other day was probably a female. Then we saw a bright blue dragonfly. We found out later it’s called (what else?) a Blue Dragonfly in the skimmer family.

At first, the expedition went like a lot of those Bigfoot expeditions on TV. The birds got nervous. We heard some tree knocking noises.

Then we saw tracks. Finally, Sena caught sight of a Bigfoot. We caught it on video—sort of.

Skimming the Parks

We took a walk on the Hickory Hill Park short Loop and the James Alan McPherson Park. We’ve lived in Iowa City for 34 years and walked only one other Hickory Hill Park trail. That was several years ago.

Just before you start the short Loop, you can read a poem, The Morning by W.S. Merwin.

We also saw a Widow Skimmer Dragonfly for the first time ever. It was spectacular.

We spotted proof positive for Bigfoot—a tree structure. OK, so not proof but interesting all the same.

And we fully noticed the two huge American Sycamore trees flanking the beginning of the walking trail on James Alan McPherson Park.

We also ran into others walking the Loop, often walking their pet animals, including a man with a Bengal cat. We’ve never heard of them. Despite its name, it was spotted more like a leopard than a tiger. It looked like a jungle cat.

It’s a great start to the July 4th holiday. Have a good one.

The Little Mundanities of Life

Sena says I need to write about some mundanities, so I will. She says the mundane things in life are important. She told me about an episode of The Waltons she saw years ago, which emphasized the importance of life’s little mundane things. I looked for the episode on the web, but couldn’t find it.

We wash and dry dishes the old-fashioned way. We never use our dishwasher, so it’s like brand new. Sena overheard a conversation two women had at the store about a kind of pre-wash spray you can get that will make it easier to get dishes cleaner when you do them the old-fashioned way. They discussed the pros and cons at length. Neither one of them bought the product.

She got a bottle of that Dawn dishwashing liquid in the upside-down bottle. You get less soap. But you can squeeze out the soap without flipping it.

She can’t seem to get the coffee maker lid down in the morning sometimes. That’s why I took a picture of it. The mundanity of it. I fixed it later in the afternoon.

Without the mundanities, life would probably wear us out. Just think if you had to tolerate a day full of odd events, like the one we heard about on the KOKZ Iowa’s Classic Hits Radio 105.7 morning program yesterday, Mike Waters Wake-Up Call. It was about this crazy rooster who crowed until he fainted. This was a pretty exciting meme in December of 2020.

When we heard it on the radio, we actually heard the THUD when the rooster finally keeled over. Could you stand that level of hilarity all the time every day?  Of course not! I wonder if that fainting consequence could apply to other situations?

Politician: “And if you elect me, I promise—THUD!”

Bigfoot Hunter: “If I hear that little twig snapping noise one more time, I will run over there and confront the hulking—THUD!”

Car Salesman: “This little coupe has only 2,000 miles on it, driven by a little old lady librarian—THUD!”

Psychiatrist: “Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, if carefully and consistently implemented, could solve every human conflict if only—THUD!”

UFO Witness: “Look at that thing! What the “bleep” is that thing?” I’ve never bleeping seen a bleepity-bleep thing like that in my bleeping life, can you believe—THUD!”

Celebrate life’s little mundanities every once in a while. They’ll give you a break from all the excitement.

The Cigarette Waltz

A couple of days ago we heard a ballet called The Cigarette Waltz by a French composer, Edouard Lalo, on one of the Iowa Public Radio (IPR) classical music programs. The announcer told a little anecdote (most of which I didn’t hear) about the saying “Smoke‘em if ya got’em” which he traced to the World War II era, reflective of the general idea that you can do what you like if you have the means. I didn’t get the connection, frankly.

I was curious about why the ballet Namouna (Valse de la cigarette) was connected with cigarettes. The first thing I did was to look up the ballet on the web. I found the version done by the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra, conducted by—Yondani Butt. That’s actually a better joke than the one by the IPR radio show host.

At first the only thing I could find out about Lalo was that his name is the answer to a crossword clue, which is “composer of the Cigarette Waltz.” I followed several dead-end leads. There’s no real connection with Lalo himself that I could find, unless you count his “hemiplegic attack” (a stroke from smoking?) which prevented him from finishing the score for the ballet.

I read the Wikipedia article summarizing the ballet, which didn’t mention cigarettes.

And finally, I found a Google book entry after using the search terms “why is Namouna called the cigarette waltz.” The book’s title is “Traveling Sprinkler Deluxe: A Novel,” written by Nicholson Baker, published by Penguin Group in 2013. It might help to read the Wikipedia synopsis of the ballet before you read Baker’s passage, which mentions a cigarette:

“It’s true that there is an opera by Edouard Lalo called The King of Ys about the flooding of Ys, based partly on a forged Breton ballad by Theodore Hersart de la Villemarque, and true that Debussy had wildly applauded Lalo’s ballet Namouna while at the conservatory, and had memorized parts of it, including perhaps the scandalous waltz in which Namouna rolls a cigarette for her paramour…”

It’s still not exactly clear what’s going on with the cigarette, but because the waltz is described as scandalous, I wonder if there was something salacious about the rolling of the cigarette. The slave girl Namouna is, after all, flirting with Ottavio.

Baker’s point is probably that the ballet is not so much about the cigarette as it is about a larger issue, judging from my general sense of his passage. Larger than a cigarette anyway.

There’s a book titled “Cigarette Waltz: Seventeen Short Stories Adaptable for Theater” by Philip-Dimitri Galas” but I was unable to access any inside text.

Alas, I couldn’t find Cliff Notes about it.