The Excessive Heat Warning is still on, so you’re going to need another heat joke:
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Kenya.
Kenya who?
Kenya open the door so I can fix your air conditioner?
I’m hoping for your sake this will be the last heat joke alert.
Category: humor
Heat Joke Alert for Crying Out Loud!
The heat wave continues and the heat joke today is:
Q: What do we say about politicians during a heat wave?
A: It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity.
The Heat Index could go as high as 114 degrees. The end might be in sight on Friday. Hang in there and stay cool.
Can You Fry an Egg on a Driveway on a Hot Day?
Sena tried to fry an egg on our driveway yesterday—and it did not go well. Let’s get the basic internet caveat out of the way. Somebody is always asking this question about whether or not you can fry an egg on a hot day.
The usual answer is something like, “It’s possible but not probable” because concrete is not conductive enough to fry an egg. It takes a temperature of 158 degrees Fahrenheit to fry an egg the regular way. But concrete gets to only about 145 degrees. When you think about it, that’s not much of a difference, though.
We’ve been in this heat wave this week, and the temperatures have been close to 100 degrees most days. You can’t count the heat index because that’s just measure of how hot humans feel when you correct for humidity combined with the air temperature. Just for the record, it did get up to around 107 degrees with the heat index.
So, she cracked an egg on our driveway and here’s what happened.
She started the test at around 11:15 a.m., checked it 5 minutes later (really no change), re-checked it at around noon, no change of course, then didn’t check it again until around 5 p.m. See the short slide show below.
The most interesting thing was the egg shell was gone. We’re not sure what took it, but many animals will eat them: birds, squirrels, chipmunks, dogs, cats, mice, and Bigfoot although he prefers beef jerky. Ants were feasting on the dried-up egg remains.
It’s pretty hot—but not hot enough to cook an egg on concrete. Even if you think you get the job done, don’t ever eat the results.
Heat Joke Alert Again!
Here’s another heat joke.
Q: How hot is it?
A: It’s so hot, you don’t have to be a liar to set your pants on fire.
All you have to do is step outside. It’s no joke, frankly. Heat index values could be in the 110-115 degree range. The Excessive Heating Warning has been extended to August 23, 2023.
The Drain Grate Flipper is Back
Some of you may remember last year’s drain grate flipping saga in which something removed one of our back yard tile drain grates nearly every day for a while last fall. It’s happening again! This time it occurred during a pretty fierce heat wave which is still ongoing. It was so hot, the videos and photos we got were really hazy.
That adventure began in late September of 2022 and went on past the middle of October. I wrote a few posts about the saga. We set up a critter cam to see if we could get it on video. We caught deer running across the yard and that’s it, except for a UFO. Check our YouTube “Caught in the Critter Cam Lights” on October 17, 2022.
Yesterday, we noticed the drain grate was off again, after a nearly a year of no problems with it. Now, a couple of months ago, a couple of other drain grates popped off, but it looked like the explanation was heavy rainfall. The pipes were full of debris and the lid was very close to the edge of the pipes.
This time, the same lid that popped off last year popped off again and it was a replay of what looks like an ongoing mystery.
I’m not ready to set up the critter cam just yet. I’m a little unsure of whether it’ll work OK in triple digit heat.
Heat Joke Alert!
OK, I got sort of a Dad joke about the heat. It’s about 106 degrees now with the heat index in Iowa City.
Q: What do you call a flying saucer on a really hot day?
A: An Unidentified Frying Object
Believe it or not, I couldn’t find this joke anywhere on the internet. So I guess that makes it original.
Sena wants to try frying an egg, and melt ice cubes and/or an ice cream bar on our driveway tomorrow.
Leave comments trying to talk her out of it and/or leave a heat joke of your own.
Thank you for your time.
How the Metta Prayer and the Shower Juggle Are Alike
I’ve been practicing mindfulness meditation since 2014, when I became uncomfortably aware of how unpleasant I was becoming on the job and elsewhere. I called this “burnout.” The word still works as an explanation although it was and is sometimes still an excuse.
I learned about the Lovingkindness meditation or the Metta Prayer during the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) course I took almost a decade ago.
I used to pray when I was a child. I read the Bible and prayed. I viewed the act of prayer as a request to God back then. And I still probably regard the Metta Prayer as a kind of bargain between me and the cosmos or whatever it is I think of as a higher power.
Just because I say the Metta Prayer doesn’t mean that anybody’s going to treat each other differently. It doesn’t make people get up and square dance together. However, the caution about not expecting others to change just because you say the Metta Prayer doesn’t mean that the practice would not enhance a sense of community—if enough people did it.
There are dozens of scripts for the Metta Prayer easily accessible on the web. The part of it that is directed to those with whom I’m having a difficult time is tricky. Often enough, my goal is to use it as a way of somehow changing the person I’m having difficulty with. It’s the same way I used prayers as a child.
That’s a mistake, but at least I’m aware of it. Prayer is not a request for God or the cosmos to intercede on my behalf so that life won’t be so difficult for me sometimes.
I have trouble remembering that I’m not really a role model, especially nowadays. I’m just an old retired guy who was difficult to work with and needed to change, despite my status as a psychiatrist. I tell dad jokes and clown around but I’m still an old guy with problems—like just about every other old guy.
So, I’m still off and on practicing the Metta Prayer. I’ve noticed that practicing mindfulness is a lot like practicing juggling, which I’ve been doing for almost a year now. I still can’t do certain tricks, like the shower juggle. I can do about three or four throws and drop the balls, sometimes on my head (which is why I wear safety goggles!). And I still tend to use prayer like I’m negotiating a deal to get rid of my faults and troubles.
But I haven’t given up practicing the shower juggle. And I haven’t given up on the Metta Prayer.
Iowa City Art in the Parks Lark 2023
The new sculptures are out in the parks and they are wonderful! We dashed out a couple days ago and logged a little over 3 miles on my step counter visiting them in several locations. The best way to get started is to read the Iowa City article, “Iowa City Sculptors Showcase.” You can get a nice map to find out where the new sculptures are and more about the artists.
Sena can’t see why Tim Adams’ Open Arms sculpture was not named The Kiss—because that’s what she thinks it looks like.
We both like Adams’s interactive work, Prairie Tussock. It reportedly spins in the wind according to the description, but I think it would take something more like what the Weather Channel might warn you about.
In fact, it has a handle to grab and reminds me of a schoolyard game we called tetherball. It was a dangerous game and I just read that it was banned because the ball could smack you in the head. I don’t even want to think about what the swinging Prairie Tussock could do to you. Remember the movie Beetlejuice? One of the characters was a woman who was a sculptor. She had a great line, “This is my art and it is dangerous!” Keep your head down.
Sena’s number 2 favorite was Hilde DeBruyne’s Circle of Trust. Her number 3 was Adams’ The Kiss—I mean Open Arms.
Prairie Tussock was also my number 1 favorite. Number 2 was a toss up between Dan Perry’s Architrave and DeBruyne’s Circle of Trust. Number 3 for me was Aidar Ishemgulov’s Upside Down. There was so much height to Architrave that I missed getting the whole thing from top to bottom. We had to return the next day to get a proper shot. I think the top part of it resembles a torch.
We enjoyed all of them, though. We think you would too.
Maybe an Iowa State Fair Contest Would Settle the Score in UFO Flap
I just saw the news story about the whistleblower David Grusch a couple days ago. Apparently, Mr. Grusch’s personal medical record was obtained through the state of Virginia’s Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) and released to the public. He was one of three people who testified recently at the House Oversight Committee hearing on Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena (UAP). He reported that the Department of Defense (DoD) had knowledge of extraterrestrial craft and “biologics” (extraterrestrial bodies?).
This reminds me of one of the final comments by one of the other three witnesses, which is worth framing as a quote:
“Don’t make the fish bigger than it was.” — retired Commander David Fravor of the U.S. Navy.
The current director of the DoD organization for UFOs, Sean Kirkpatrick, PhD, who heads the All-Domain Anomaly Resolution Office (AARO), expressed his objection in no uncertain terms to Mr. Grusch’s testimony, calling it insulting.
Anyway, I had to learn a little bit more about the FOIA, and found out that in addition to the federal government FOIA, each state has its own FOIA process. I looked up the Virginia state FOIA, and usually personal medical records are one of the exempted files. Apparently, they can still release them.
I think this might be an attempt to discredit Mr. Grusch. I’m puzzled by the release of his medical history. I don’t know anything about specific protections for retaliation against whistleblowers, but I would think exposing anyone’s medical record would count.
Not to spread any more conspiracy theories, but what if this whole thing is a well-orchestrated complex distraction from the general shambles of our political system? It would tend to discourage other whistleblowers from coming forward. Maybe that’s the intent.
If politicians and people in general were to make a concerted effort to treat each other with civility, respect, and a sense of humor, maybe these embarrassing sideshows could be minimized.
I don’t know if UAP involve advanced civilizations from across the galaxy and I doubt it. In fact, I tend to think a quote from Men in Black would fit:
“Human thought is so primitive it’s looked upon as an infectious disease in the better galaxies.”
I’m pretty sure most ETs have been steering clear of us for a long time.
How about this: the Iowa State Fair is on now, and it runs from August 10-20. I haven’t checked this out with anyone at the Fair, but if we could persuade David Grusch and Sean Kirkpatrick to settle their differences by competing in one or more of the contests coming up in the coming week, we might be able to get them to shake hands and have some laughs. Sena and I have never been to the Iowa State Fair, but if this event could be added, I think we could swing a trip there.
I see that the Cow Chip Throwing contest is scheduled for August 16 at 11 a.m. That would be a knee slapper.
It’s too late to arrange for them to compete in the Monster Arm Wrestling contest, which is this Sunday. Could a special event be scheduled later?
How about a cribbage game? The Cribbage Tournament is on August 20, starting at 10 a.m. with registration and the games start at 11 a.m. Now that would be special since Sena and I are fans of the game. David and Sean would have to learn how to play cribbage ahead of time, and it’s not that hard.
There are other events, but the guys need to get ready and decide soon so they can enter. And they should notify me so that Sena and I can make the trip to Des Moines and catch the action.
Both winner and loser should get free corn dogs.
What Kind of Census Does This Make?
We finished our Census Bureau survey and it seems like we just did this not long ago. It’s taken every 10 years but it seems like we got this form a few years ago.
They say it takes about 40 minutes to complete, but it sure felt like there were many more questions on it this time and the questions asked about a lot of things like income, taxes, etc. that we don’t remember from before.
Did anybody else get this feeling? I mean we really had to do things like get data from records and do math and sweat the details.
We asked ourselves what would happen if we just refused to do it. So, I looked it up. It turns out that there is a $5,000 penalty the bureau can impose if you refuse to do it or give false information.
On the other hand, Census Bureau officials have said nobody’s been prosecuted since 1970. I wonder what happened to that person? Is he still paying off the fine? Is he in jail because he couldn’t pay it? Was he abducted by extraterrestrials and is he still trying to get them to pay it?
There are other questions I had that led me to search the web. It looks like the best place to start might be the Census Bureau website itself. The section Census Bureau 101 for Students looks like a good place to start. The census has been around since 1790 and back then it was only a six-question survey:
What is your gender? (There are more choices nowadays)
What is your race? (It was not the 40-yard dash)
What is the name of the head of the household? (It’s always the wife!)
What is the relationship to the head of the household? (It’s always the husband!)
How many slaves do you own?
What is your occupation? (Tea party activists didn’t count)
There’s an interesting section on the web site PRB, entitled “Hard-to-Count Populations.”:
Decades of research have shown that the decennial census is very accurate, but (like population censuses in other countries) it is subject to both undercount and overcount errors that differ by age, sex, and race. The 2010 Census was no exception. Despite the best efforts and careful planning of Census Bureau staff, the direct, physical enumeration of the U.S. population is imperfect.
Part of the challenge in counting the population accurately is that some people are harder to count than others. People who lack a permanent address are less likely to complete a census form than people who have a permanent address. Similarly, language barriers, distrust of government, and frequent moves tend to make certain groups harder to count. On the other side of the spectrum, some people may be counted more than once. For example, those who own more than one home may submit a census form for each address, and children away at college may be counted at both their college and parental home.
If you decide not to complete the Census Bureau survey, they probably won’t fine you or throw you in jail. They could visit your house up to six times though. And if you manage to slip them every time, they could check with your neighbors to get the skinny on you.
You might as well do it.
Go Retire Psychiatrist 