Go Retire Psychiatrist

There’s a recent Rounding@Iowa podcast on Ultra Processed Foods that’s interested. Right off the bat, it fits in with June being National Dairy Month. It’s interesting that the less processed foods tend to be at the outer perimeter of the grocery store where they can be kept cooler and the more processed foods tend to be in the center because they have preservatives and don’t need to be kept cooler.

That’s a clue that healthier foods can be easily found. The other way to develop a healthier eating is to prepare a couple of days’ worth of meals ahead of time, so you spend less time with meal prep.

Sena does all of the grocery shopping and cooking, which is a good thing because we’d hardly eat at all if I were in charge. She tells me she ran into a guy once at the store who had 50 frozen pizzas in his cart which he throws into a big freezer at home for his sons. That’s all they like—pizzas. And he doesn’t cook.

I can come up with excuses for why I don’t cook, of course. Any wise guy can do that. Mom cooked at home. Back in my day, boys went to shop class in junior high school and the girls went to Home Economics (home ec for short). Guys learned how to make a pencil holder shaped like a dice. We didn’t know what the girls learned; apparently it was a big secret.

As a young man, the only place I could afford to live was in a room at the YMCA. I could barely fit myself in it, so there was no room for a kitchen. I ate all my meals in cafes. Half the time, my job as a surveyor’s assistant was to travel to out-of-town jobs. We stayed in hotels and ate in restaurants.

Let’s see, what other excuses can I make? Decades ago, after Sena and I got married and moved into a house, I tried to cook a meal. I managed to start a small fire in the frying pan, which had grease in it. I panicked and threw water on it. We’re lucky the house didn’t burn to the ground. Now watch, somebody will say “You have no excuse not to get in there and learn how to cook!”

And to that I would say that firefighters deserve a rest once in a while.

Where was I? Oh, eating too many ultra processed foods can contribute to all cause mortality, which I didn’t know. That’s why I consume only—aha, you thought I was going to say “kale and spunk water 3 times a day” didn’t you? I don’t use that joke anymore because too many commenters took me seriously. I was pulling your leg!

We have also eaten quinoa (pronounced keen-wah, I believe). The nutritionist mentioned that in the podcast. You can find out more about that in my post “Extraterrestrials Need Lentils Anonymous Program.”