Signs to Guide Me

It’s been a long while since my last post. I’ve been busy looking for signs to help guide me in adjusting to this retirement gig. It’s a tough skill set to learn.

I saw this bug on our house the other day. It turned out to be a Praying Mantis. Don’t quibble about the precious difference between mantids and mantises—I don’t have the patience for that. Anyway, this one didn’t have the typical pose, with the long forelegs cocked into a prayerful posture. It looked more like it was just trying to find its way—kind of like how I feel.

I read a little bit on the web about the Praying Mantis. One culture says seeing one is good luck and another says it’s bad. I read just enough to hope there is no such thing as reincarnation. I hope never to come back as a male Praying Mantis, if you get what I mean. Look it up.

What I really would appreciate is somebody telling me about what would be the best way to adjust to retirement. Many days go by when I struggle to shake the notion that I was never really any good at anything other than being a doctor.

I need a sign. I need many signs, as a matter of fact. Just to clear my head, I went for a long walk out on the Clear Creek Trail. I noticed quite a few signs out there. Most of them seemed to have some special significance. That’s just because I’m preoccupied with getting used to being retired.

There were signs of September on the trail. Specific signs telling you to do something or not do something else. And there were signs that you generally see every September that tell you autumn is on the way.

It reminded me of that song, “Try to Remember,” which has always struck me as lugubrious.

I just need a sign and I don’t care if the Praying Mantis points it out or not.

Author: James Amos

I'm a retired consult-liaison psychiatrist. I navigated the path in a phased retirement program through the hospital where I was employed. I was fully retired as of June 30, 2020. This blog chronicles my journey.

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