SD cards – Go Retire Psychiatrist

This is not an April Fools joke, just to let you know. I just returned the second of two SD memory cards for our Nikon camera this morning. I returned the first one about a week ago. I got refunds. These cards are expensive and can set you back a hundred bucks or more.

They both had the same problem—a loose locking switch on the card which is supposed to control whether the card is in a locked or unlocked position. If it’s locked, it’s impossible to upload photos and video from the camera to your computer.

The two SD cards were made by different companies, so the problem is not restricted to a specific manufacturer.

The sales staff said he’d never heard of the problem. I was incredulous. I looked on the web for evidence that this has been going on for years (which I told him). I found a page dated 2006 about the issue.

While it’s possible to accidentally push the switch from unlocked to locked, it shouldn’t do that just by sticking the card in the SD memory card reader in the computer tower or in a handy external SD card reader if the slot on the tower goes dead—which happened to me a couple of years ago (see my post “The SD Card Caper”).

The switch is very small, as you can see in the pictures. In the pictures, the switch is shown in the unlocked position. If it slides into the locked position, you won’t be able to download your pictures except by copying them. It’s annoying to be unable to delete them. This could be embarrassing if somebody gets a hold of the card and decides to post the pictures of you and a certain somebody in a compromising position at the office Christmas party in the company newsletter.

People talk about gluing or using scotch tape to keep the switch in the unlocked position. It can be a problem on older cards, but it shouldn’t happen in brand new cards.

I could have made this an April Fool’s post by making up a story about trying to use superglue to fix a loose SD card switch. But people talk seriously about doing things like that. OK, maybe not superglue, but some kind of glue, possibly Elmer’s.

There might be a way to get around the crazy switch technology by somehow making an SD card that could converse with its owner. Remember those old 1980s era Chrysler New Yorkers that had a built in Electric Voice Alert (EVA) system which made the cars talk? Of course you don’t. That was in the 1980s. We had one. Our car was prone to saying things that sounded a lot like a dad jokes, like “A door is ajar.” It also said “Don’t forget your keys” and “Your washer fluid is low.”

But if the manufacturers could make the SD card communicate with you in simple language about locking and unlocking itself, it would make the gadgets a lot easier to manage. On the other hand, they would need to work on the Artificial Intelligence (AI) to make sure you and the card are on the same page.

Hal; unlock the card.

Don’t forget your keys.

Darn it! No, Hal; unlock the card!

When is a door not a door? When it is ajar! Har! (sound of hand slapping a knee).

Unlock the card, Hal, PLEASE!

Your libido is low.

OK, Hal, last time; I want you to unlock the card now!

Place the body in the trunk of the car.

On second thought, maybe you should try scotch tape.

I have an SD card (more commonly called just a “memory card”) for my camera and the other day I couldn’t download the videos to my computer using the SD card reader in the tower. The card reader is just a slot-shaped port in the tower, above the USB ports. SD stands for Secure Digital. It’s really secure when you can’t download any videos or pictures.

This had never happened before. Naturally I turned to the internet for guidance, which was my first mistake. I never saw so many web sites with confusing advice, some of which involve zip lines.

Most of the web sites assumed I could see the icon for the SD card on my computer screen, but I couldn’t. Several web site help sites (hah!) breezily suggested I rename the disc or update the driver, or contact the extraterrestrials who manufactured the item as if I wanted them to know where I am so they can abduct me again.

This suggested the problem was probably the SD card reader in my computer—The XPS 8950, my nearly new computer which has already had major parts replaced and which is now out of warranty.

Only a couple of websites were on the right track about the SD card reader itself. One expert said that if I blew in the slot (That’s right! Not as dumb as it sounds; dust can be a problem) and wiped the card with a Q-Tip, and it still didn’t work, I should try it in a different computer. If it worked, then the problem was probably the card reader. It turns out you can blow on the SD card reader or the SD card until you’re blue in the face if the card is not detected in the Device Manager or any Device. If the card is dead, you get a new card, “and let it go.” Those are the exact words from that expert. Do I also have to sit in the lotus position?

Anyway, I did try the card in the SD card reader in my wife’s computer. It worked!

But if the SD card works in another device, the problem could be a dead SD card reader. What should you do?

Well, when a couple of fans went out in my tower when it was under warranty, a repair guy came over, took the tower apart and replaced the fans. My machine is out of warranty and I don’t want to go through the same hassle of negotiating with the manufacturer to work out a time compatible with the repair guy’s bowling league schedule to drive to our house from British Columbia.

On the other hand, could I replace the SD card reader in the tower itself? A long time ago, I replaced a fan in my computer, which reminds me; you should never install oscillating fans in a computer.

Here’s the thing—I found a web page that fits my situation exactly, right down to the make and model of the tower. It turns out that it’s probably not possible to replace the SD card reader in the tower without replacing the mother board, which you, as a home user, should not attempt unless you have been drinking heavily.

What I found out is that combination USB with SD card readers are available and all you have to do is stick the SD card in the reader slot on the unit and plug the USB into the port on the tower. The whole thing fits in the palm of your hand.

Now our toaster doesn’t work.