No Need to Shout, I Can Hear You

The FDA just announced their final ruling on improving access to hearing aids. You can read the final ruling itself, but by the time you finish it, you’ll be dead and won’t need a hearing aid.

Every time I fail to follow Sena’s directions, I remind her of how a loud rock concert ruined my hearing. It was a Rare Earth concert decades ago in my wasted youth. What do you mean you never heard of Rare Earth?

And if you believe that, I have some prime farm land in the Florida Everglades I can sell you where you can grow all the alligators you want. Prices are slashed literally to the bone of any extra limbs you don’t think you need.

Anyway, I think I do have some hearing loss. And it would be nice to be able to get hearing aids that work without spending an arm and a leg (unless you want to talk about a real estate deal in the Everglades; make me an offer!).

A lot of people who develop hearing loss have a lack of insight into the problem. I think that might be why so many of us at least have the impulse to say things like:

“Speak up!” “Why are you mumbling?” “Quit talking with your mouth full!”

Hearing loss can lead to misunderstandings which can sometimes be hilarious. It’s probably the reason for some mondegreens, which are mishearing words in song lyrics (“Excuse me, while I kiss this guy,” Jimi Hendrix—actually the lyric is “Excuse me while I kiss the sky”).

I’m not sure when hearing aids that are effective, safe, and affordable will be available. Maybe after the aliens finish their human-alien hybridization program, which will make talking unnecessary. We can just read each other’s thoughts. That’s actually scarier than having trouble hearing.

Author: James Amos

I'm a retired consult-liaison psychiatrist. I navigated the path in a phased retirement program through the hospital where I was employed. I was fully retired as of June 30, 2020. This blog chronicles my journey.

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