Go Retire Psychiatrist

You know, sometimes I wonder about rephrasing the line in the Men in Black movie, “Let’s put it on…the last suit you’ll ever wear.”

How about, “Let’s do it…the last house you’ll ever buy.” That’s what I think the retirement home should be.

Houses are getting harder to find and the home-buying experience has sometimes been, shall we say, less than a barrel of laughs?

Like many people, we’ve been through a lot of moves. I’m getting too old for this hassle.

Let’s just say I’d like to be done with moving. I don’t mean we should move to a “retirement home” as in one of those retirement communities. I worry that crabbiness and the old-fashioned ways could get to critical mass and we could all go up in an explosion of anecdotage.

Apartment living? I don’t think so. Neighbors are too nosy and too noisy.

Condos? Home Owners Associations (HOAs)? I’m waiting for some hare-brained producer to inflict this notion on TV viewers in the form of yet another crappy reality show.

How’s that for crabbiness?