OK, Maybe Robins Can Build Nests Anywhere

I’ve been making fun of birds who build funny-looking and impractical nests. Maybe I’ve been wrong about the robins, though. My wife alerted me by phone that the robin I joked about in my YouTube video, “Nest Building for Bird Brains,” had actually cobbled together a convincing nest underneath our deck.

I couldn’t believe it. I think the only explanation is alien influence. Their heads are egg-shaped and that’s about the only proof you need.

I figure the aliens get into our dimension via spacecraft through a wormhole, which would appeal to a bird, especially a robin. They love worms! They would just as soon gobble up a worm as poop on your Hostas. Then the alien probes the robin (they got this thing about cloaca probing), inserting an egg as big as my head for crying out loud. This naturally leads to a change in the robin’s central nervous system, leading it to become insane in the bird brain (so to speak) and rendering it incapable of doing the normal thing like building a nest in a tree, so they end up slapping it under a deck, in your lawn mower, on top of your god-forsaken egghead, good gahd amighty!

However, you can hardly call it quibbling when I point out there’s no bottom in the nest—yet. On the other hand, if I were a betting man, I would have bet against it getting built at all.

You can still see the floor board! Ya gonna lay eggs on that?

Our guess is that, at this rate, the floor will be down in no time and eggs will likely be laid soon after that.

Hoorah’s nest if I ever saw one…

We now have three bird nests to keep track of for the next couple of weeks—cardinal, house finch, and now the robin. At this rate, we’ll be lucky to keep up.

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