Darn Weird Socks

Today, a colleague and I compared socks. I noticed he was wearing a pair of Go Iowa Hawkeye-type socks. They looked pretty good—and then I showed him my brand-new Taco Avocado Alien socks. He was pretty impressed. They are the Darn Weird socks of America.

On the other hand, around 3 years ago, I found out about Darn Tough socks and got a couple pairs. They’re still tough, no matter how many stairs I climb.

Darn Tough socks have an unconditional lifetime replacement guarantee. They’re made in Vermont. They’re not cheap. But hey, if they’re good enough for dairy farmers in Wisconsin, they got to be good enough for me.

I’m not sure how long my Taco Avocado Alien socks are going to last. I usually get about 2-3 miles and 20 floors and more logged on my step counter as I hoof it around the hospital in my job as a Consultation-Liaison Psychiatrist. Today I logged 2.9 miles and 27 floors. And when I got home, I exercised in them. I wore my geezer Velcro tennis shoes, of course.

That kind of punishment often leads to my wearing out socks in a few weeks. Usually the toes go quick. Maybe my Darn Weird socks won’t last. I Like the Taco Avocado Alien theme anyway. I still haven’t figured out what the connection is between aliens, tacos, and avocados. Sure, you make guacamole from avocado for tacos and so they’re all green. Maybe that’s all there is to it.

Then again, we have to ask ourselves, do aliens like tacos with guacamole? I guess you’d have to ask the guys on the Ancient Aliens TV show (it’s on the History Channel), which I watch every Friday. It’s relaxing and often puts me to sleep. Does Giorgio A. Tsoukalos, a.k.a. the hair guy, wear Taco Avocado Alien socks? There are so many memes out there about him, it wouldn’t surprise me if you could find a picture of him wearing them—photo-shopped, of course.

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